Jesus General Is The Most Masculinely Conservative Blogger On The Planet

[administrator]

Discuss...

[MacStansbury]

This is the most shameless plea for attention I've even seen.

[wyneken]

I agree completely with the subject line of this post. JESUS' GENERAL is the finest conservative blog on the internet and deserves to be recognized by an appropriate Weblog Award.

I'm totally serious. Not to say there aren't other noteworthy conservative blogs out there -- but the General stands far above the rest in representing the true spirit of contemporary movement conservatism. Consider these points:

- Unlike many other bloggers, the General is totally proud and straightforward about speaking up for who we really are:  AMERICAN, PATRIOTIC, MALE (with the exception of some notorious media personalities, and stay-at-home mom types who do not participate actively in the Movement), BIBLE-BELIEVING, and HETEROSEXUAL (at least in our public lifestyle). Nobody who follows the news can seriously quibble with any of this.

- The General lays it right on the line in equating true patriotism with personal loyalty to George W. Bush. This is an undeniable equation. Look at the traitors who have opposed the President or his policies or his appointees, who have been successfully identified as ENEMIES OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE, even if they have tried to prove otherwise by spending some time trying to subvert our nation's strength as members of the Armed Forces in uniform. Like that wimp John Kerry or that turncoat who beat Senator George Allen, who should make all fellow Marines angry and ashamed.

- The General has a sense of humor, but does not try to get "cute." He would never, for example, flap his arms around making fun of a celebrity with Parkinson's Disease. He would just call the celebrity a gutless traitor, a coward, an egomaniac, and a publicity hound sucking up to the Hollywood liberal elite for all he's worth -- which is what any good Conservative, Heterosexual, Christian American secretly believes, even though we may not all have the guts to say it. Which is just why we need the General!

- The General doesn't mewl about "political incorrectness," which is a fault that I find in almost every other conservative blogger. Let's admit it, boys -- there is NOTHING LESS DARING in all of modern American life than announcing that you are about to say something that is "politically incorrect." This is a code phrase for, "I'm about to say something that I KNOW every one of you out there is going to agree with, because it will insult and piss-off the liberals, gays, feminazis, environmentalists, abortionists, atheists, so-called "disabled," so-called "minorities," and especially left-wing radical Europeans and Terrorists!!!"

The General doesn't waste our time like that. He just comes right out and says what everyone is thinking.

For all these reasons, I strongly recommend that Jesus' General be acclaimed as the Best Conservative Weblog for 2006.

[MacStansbury]

See?

[spacemonkey]

The funniest thing I found about Jesus' General was when I left the site.

I suppose it might be funny to imagine that someone actually laughs at it but I don't have that kind of imagination.

[Laurence Simon]

Discuss...

Pfeh.

Jesus General is crap.

[L.G. F*cktard]

This is the most shameless plea for attention I've even seen.
-- MacStansbury
See?
-- MacStansbury
………..
See what, MacStansbury?
I see that Jesus' General is hardly desperate for attention:

2005 Weblog Award winner: Best Humor/Comics Blog:
1st)   Jesus' General……..32.16 %  (17,619)
2nd) The Dilbert Blog   ………14.97 %   (8200)

2004 Koufax Award Winner: Most Humorous Blog:
Jesus' General
………….
And that the Weblog Awards Forum is not the place to seek it anyway:

Weblog Award Forum Stats:
Most Online Ever: 7
67 Posts in 15 Topics by 27 Members
13 Posts by MacStansbury (one-fifth of all posts)
……….
Although the Weblog Awards itself isn't a bad place for someone seeking a little fun:

Weblog Award Faq:
Q: What are The Weblog Awards all about?
A: Fun!
…….
And that this is something that at least one of the Genrul's competitors for Best Conservative Blog gets:

Ya know, General and minions, I really didn't mean to cause that much of a kerfluffle. Provoke a reaction, yes, but, more in fun. Though, I am sure y'all aren't that familiar with me.
Just so ya know, I did nominate this site for Liberal site of the year. Looks like this site has alot more fun then some of the other big Liberal sites.
So, in all seriousness, I hope this site wins the Weblog Award. I will vote for it, and good luck! I really do mean it.
William Teach | Homepage: Pirate's Cove | 11.17.06 - 7:15 pm |

……..
Which is why I returned the favor, even though Mr. Teach is the drivelswigging bilge rat what called for existing Jesus' General nominations to be deleted (and many were, despite the Weblog Awards suggestion to the contrary).
………
See?

[MacStansbury]

You wonder what that vote would look like if there was a link on dilbert.com. These are the things I think about.

So, hey, I guess it wouldn't matter that I was referring to the obvious flamebait title of this thread. Sort of exactly like the other one for IMAO that I should've said the same thing in, but the title wasn't as good.

And, about my stats here, you mean I'd want to help out my friend, Snoop Kevy Kev, keep his message board full o'posts? MADNESS!

Anyways, I know it's not in your nature, but how's about acting with some class?

[MacStansbury]

Oh, and this would be post 15. I wonder what my stats look like now?

[ChrisCarlisle]

Anyways, I know it's not in your nature, but how's about acting with some class?

Judging by the login name, I don't think "class" factors into it.

Congrats admin, your thread bait worked.

[L.G. F*cktard]

It is in my nature, believe it or not. I apologize for misinterpreting your post. I should have asked you to clarify what you meant by the "This" in "This is the most shameless plea for attention…"

I mentioned the 20005 and 2004 awards, in part, to point out to others on this thread that there are many who do consider Jesus' General funny.

I mentioned your posts not to criticize you in some way, but to underscore my now irrelevant argument that this forum is not exactly a great advertising space for someone seeking self-promotion.

My comment was a defense, not a personal attack, MacStansbury. The "drivelswigging bilge rat" remark and backhanded nomination was delivered in the same spirit as Mr. Teach delivered his remark and backhanded nomination.

So how's about acting with some class?

[administrator]

This is the most shameless plea for attention I've even seen.

Not really, it's just a redirection from the hundreds of mindlessly similar (and occasionally humorous) nominations that are now junk the junk basket.  As I explained to one deleted commenter; I get the joke, I just don't want them spamming up the nominations to make their jokes.  This thread allows them to continue their chatter away from the nomination posts.

[Beth]

All I can say is, funny or not, it would be a huge pain in the ass for the person who ends up working on that category.  If you ask me, you did someone a huge favor by deleting the extraneous nonsense, and something tells me the "General" and his fanboys wouldn't be among the volunteers.

[earlfando]

This just goes to show why political humour fails to truly amuse.  I mean, you just wind up with one side or the other pissed off.

A truly non-partisan humour blog, like The Dictionary of Unfortunate Ideas works to piss everyone off equally!

Sorry, I mean "unite"..."unite everyone equally."  Which is what we're all about...and promoting world peace.  I'm pretty sure almost every post we put up is an anagram for "world peace" in some language or another, usually Esperanto.

[mark717]

yes utter nonsese...some people think lame cartoons are funny too.